I had a conversation with my mother recently and really was surprised at how we both displayed such intense emotions for really nothing at all. Our conversation was really about how I made a joke and how she didn’t receive what I said in a joking manner.
Well, short sparks ignited and I reassured her that I made a joke and I really was resistant to the fact that she didn’t understand my joke. Could she really think that I was insinuating a negative statement about her? Was I really presenting her with a negative statement? What was the fear here I asked myself as I drove home?
My conclusion is that my mother and I both relied on old emotional patterns that have been locked into our egos – our thought patterns, which send signals to our bodies of how we feel we are suppose to react. These signals drive our emotions. We both became emotional and it happened so fast that I couldn’t believe I was standing there defending myself as she was. I have to admit that for five seconds, I became lost in my thoughts in trying to convince her that I was joking. But, I really think that what I “joked” about was inadequacy I felt which provoked her ego to defend its belief system.
We have to remember in all situations that we cannot allow fear to drive us. We are fearful of our identity dying because our identity, which is our belief system (also called ego), will no longer represent us. It can be an uneasy feeling to NOT know what we identify with especially when the very thing that we perceive to be our identification is lost. The beauty of losing our scripted identity is that we can just BE without knowing who we are. Thoughts of fear send signals to our bodies and that’s our emotions. So, whenever you feel down, negative, rushed or jealous, or have any feeling that makes you feel somber instead of vibrant, be the watcher of those thoughts. Our thoughts guide our emotions and our emotions feed our thoughts. This cycle becomes vicious. Create a space between You (Being) from the thoughts (mind) and step away from those thoughts and you will see your negative emotions subside. We are in control and we are the “silent watcher” of those pesty and predictable thoughts per Eckart Tolle.
Our emotions always give us an indication of what we are thinking. Remember, whether good feelings are bad feelings, our emotions always change because no emotion is permanent. Fear is a powerful emotion. However, our Beings are everlasting. Don't let fear prevent you from making deposits into this life. Some may appreciate our giving and some may not. The beauty of "making a deposit" is that it comes from our Being which is a direct connect to God! We are spiritual beings having a human experience so we should have patience with ourselves and accept it is what it is. Isn’t that a wonderful relief?
Sending positive energy your way, always!
Listen to your heart: Lock Stock and Barrel - Rise Above It